Loving Difficult People

Have you ever had someone wound you by being "ugly" (as my mamma would say)??

Have you ever had someone completely drive you crazy and annoy you half to death?

Have you ever had someone accuse you of something you legitimately did not do?

Have you ever wondered if someone's mamma didn't spank them enough?

Have you ever become a hermit during certain events because you wanted to avoid a certain person?

Have you ever wondered if people think that about you?

I haven't.

Just kidding. It happens often to me, and I don't handle it well. Sometimes I bottle it up. Sometimes I practice to the mirror what I'd say back if he/she said that again to me. Sometimes I fall apart and cry. And almost always I mentally defend myself because I feel like what God says about me is not enough.

I've been struggling with my response to people who hurt me over the last 6 months or so. So a couple of days ago I found Beth Moore's "Loving Difficult People" study on youtube. Some of you just read Beth Moore and are really excited, but others of you (possibly my Presbo friends) are thinking that she's not what the pastor recommends. I was in the same boat a few weeks ago--but now I say that when you give me the name of another FEMALE who has recorded Bible Studies that are Biblically sound and speak to me like this, I'll listen to her too. :)

Anyway, check the first part out Here:

Loving Difficult People

And once you listen to it, on the right side you can choose part 2,3,4,5, and 6 as well. Part 6 kicked my butt. I listened to the whole thing during my workout this morning. It. was. awesome.

Also, does anyone follow someone's sermons or Bible Studies that really speak to you? I'll listen to men but am particularly even more interested in women speakers. :) Comment much if you have ideas for me!

First Trimester

First Trimester....CHECK.

I'm 13 weeks yesterday, and the child is the size of a medium shrimp. Unfathomable that my medium shrimp already has veins, organs, fingernails, and more than 2 million eggs in her ovaries if she's a girl. Hopefully. Not hopefully she's a girl. Hopefully he developed all that other stuff. If not, I'm still pretty sure we'll love himher the same.

Rejoice!

Let's just say I can't wait until Sunday morning. :)

3 Cheers for Exercise!

I have been coping with feelings of insecurity, self-esteem, and anxiety during the first trimester of this pregnancy. The nausea and lethargy have been a real challenge for me. I can handle the sickness itself, but the results have welcomed some dark moments for me. I am a do-er. I like to get things done, check things off my list, have the house clean, have people over for dinner, work, read, volunteer, get out and be active with my family, and spend time with Jed. And I really like to exercise. Exercise is my way of gathering endorphins and energy, my inspiration for eating well, my sense of accomplishment, and it just plain old makes me feel good. But during the first trimester, chasing a one year old around and pushing through the bare necessities (grocery trips, work, etc.) has been all I can handle.

Last week I began feeling better, and this week I began my exercise regime again. Right now my calves feel like someone is stabbing them, my butt is hardly sittable, my quads are screaming, and my back is difficult to turn. But I feel good. I feel tough again like the warriors that we women are. I feel strong, like I can “do,” and playing with Braden is a joy once again. I also don’t feel quite as insecure or ugly. This has nothing to do with looking better just the feeling better part.

So I went and spent a bit of money on badly needed maternity clothes. Jed was just ecstatic (Sarcasm, people.)

Anyway, my point is that I need exercise in my life. Evidently I am quite a miserable being without it and I feel terrible about myself. Dr. Tinker told me that some things are chemical and cannot be controlled by reading the Bible or praying more. I now believe him even more. I believe God gave me exercise to rejuvenate me…He designed me like this, and I am going to take advantage of it. Even if I am too pitifully out of shape to run my 3 mile route in the miserable heat. I like my Tony Horton, and I will let him kick my butt indoors.

So today I am raising my glass to exercise!

I have no good connection, but here is some of the fun Braden had this week.

Wyatt is moving and so he came over to get a break from his parents and all the ugly boxes. And Eli and Jude stopped by to say hello for a bit in the afternoon.



Our washing machine box turned house (although this confused Eli because technically there is no door). I love these boys, and Braden thought he was so big playing with them.

Summa Time!

Introduction: I was never sick while pregnant with Braden. With this pregnancy, I have hardly made it through a day without feeling like I was going to vomit at any given moment and oftentimes doing so.

Yesterday's conversation between Jed and me:
Whitney: I think I'm feeling better.
Jed: I can tell!
Whitney: How?
Jed: The den is picked up and you planned dinner.

Wow. And he's right. By picked up he meant not in shambles with to do piles all over the kitchen table. And by dinner he meant that I actually went to the store and bought food for meals and even set out some of the ingredients for him to make dinner because I had a meeting to attend.
And by the way. Homeboy can make some mean turkey wraps although cooking is most definitely not a pleasure for him.

And on to the pictures from May since I haven't felt like posting hardly anything. We threw a small party for the little man last Sunday for his first birthday.

I ordered this AMAZING cake from Bit Bakes. Adonia makes incredible cakes and is raising money for she and her husband to adopt a baby. She also works at Bethany Christian Services. So she's a winner in my book!! Also, the cake tasted amazing.Last weekend, Jed took off Friday-Tuesday and we had a staycation. Let's just say we did not stop and we filled our time with insane amounts of fun things. We went to the Sunset Symphony with some people from church, visited the zoo with 2 couples from church and my family, played frisbee golf, visited the park, bought a new car to replace the one that was totaled in the wreck, went to a birthday party for sweet Sawyer Ray, and had good, solid time together. It. Was. Awesome. And here are just a few pics to prove it.

And then there were FOUR!

A few months ago, Jed declared that we should begin the dash for the next baby. He said it was because I seemed so happy being with Braden and working from home writing/editing.

But I know the truth.

If you read my blogs about the long road we walked down to add Braden to our family, you understand his inclination. I am quite certain that Jed recognized that the longer it took, the more emotion and drama he would have to deal with--long nights of my why-doesn't-my-womb-work crying and days of tears watching siblings play together hoping and praying that God would bless Braden in that sweet way.

Or maybe he was telling the truth. Or maybe it was a bit of both. Who knows?

I will tell a short story now:

Two months later I found out I was 5 weeks pregnant (10 weeks now).

I told you it was a short story!

I looked up giggling and told God, "You are hilarious. Really?? This easy this time??"

His grace and mercy washes over even the weakest of sinners!

So ladies and gentlemen, here is the newest addition to our family, 19 months younger than Braden, due December 20! We are humbled and ecstatic that God has given new life to our family.
I am overjoyed at the thought of giving Braden a sibling. Maybe that's because we went to the park last night and I watched as he made comical little faces and noises at the older kids. It's time somebody taught that kid some social skills. Jed says he's just one. I think he's a nerd. Agree to disagree.

Also, I cannot even explain how much I adore my sisters and absolutely think they're the best gift my parents ever gave me. Jed feels the same way about his brothers. But of course in a manly, I-eat-red-meat kind of way. Obviously. Now Braden gets that too!

I will update more on the day to day happenings soon. But Jed is taking a long weekend, and we are staycationing. Yesterday we watched Harry Potter, played disc golf, and visited the park playground and today we are off to the Sunset Symphony.....love spending time with my little fam.

Happy Birthday, Braden!!

Dear Braden,

One year ago today, you shattered my expectations for being a parent. I felt like a million cables literally bound me to you in the most supernatural way. My expectation was that I'd love you, but I'd be frustrated at giving up a little of my independence. The frustration and difficulty of giving up my independence cannot even compare to the careless, freeing joy of loving a son. Your little soul changed me at the core of who I am, and you will not understand how resounding that is until you are a parent too.
The crazy, unprecedented, hormonal mood swings and hours of tears I shed were quite a shock as well. I still look at a brand new mom and almost cry for her because of what she was just introduced to--an entire breadth and world of emotions that were never thought possible by a rational, thinking, working, intelligent being.

You spent your first few months getting used to me and your dad. You would not crack a smile nor would you look anyone in the face. But every once in awhile, you'd make a crazy dino noise to tell us you were still there and functioning. Soon enough, you woke up from your introspective world and proved that you have some Rieves blood--you love to have fun, you laugh at yourself, and you think you're funny. For example, it is early in the morning, and I just got you out of bed and whispered the first few paragraphs of this letter to you. You giggled, scrunched up your nose, and smatted your forehead against mine knowingly. You are also serious and you are a thinker like your dad. As in, you think everything through, and make pointed, directed actions. And you will not perform on cue. You might have many tricks, but you will not do them on command, you will do them as you feel like it. Also like your dad. Best thing? You love to sing, and you love to dance.

We are so proud of you, and we cannot imagine life without you. But there are a few things you must know:

-I love your dad. He's still my number one. One day you'll leave me, and you'll love another woman. Your dad will always be with me, and by then, he'll be taking me on vacations to Hawaii to lay on the beach and drink toddies. You will be figuring professional life out and having babies that I can spoil and give back.
-Also, we have house rules. Respect the bill-payers. All involved tenants will do chores, and you will say like your father used to say, "I am willing." (This is a Hale family rule. And I like it.)
-Your parents will mess up. We will owe you lots of apologies and make lots of wrong decisions. We will hurt you, and we will make you mad. But you'll be okay. And you will always be able to tell us when we've hurt you. Also, I'll pay for your therapy,
-If you disrespect me and talk back, well....let's just say, don't. do. it.
-We will have fun as a family. It's a rule. It was my favorite rule in my house growing up, and I intend to implement it. There will always be discipline, but there will also always be jumps in mud puddles, slip 'n slides, parties with friends, playing in the rain, huge cardboard boxes, chocolate pie fights, and wrestling.
-There are more....but I'll teach you as we go.

And in the words of Tina Fey for her daughter, I pray this for you as my son:

"Guide her, protect her. When crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age."
But most of all, know that you are loved unconditionally. You will never do anything bad enough to take away my love or your dad's love. It's that intense. But bigger than that, God loves you. And He wants you as His own. We believe that more than we believe anything. And when your Dad and I fail you (and we will), you will know that God's love covers that. And when you feel alone or ignored or like a failure, God's love will cover that too. So take His love--it's free, it's yours, and the greatness and fullness of it, you'll never understand it.

I love you, Braden Matthew Hale!